Archive for February, 2009

best kids’ book title ever

Thursday, February 26th, 2009

Toby bought this book home from school today: “Let’s Explore Uranus“. Unfortunately he pronounces it the politically correct, modern way (with the emphasis on the first syllable) but it was still enough for Emma to be in serious pain with laughter.

best headline ever

Tuesday, February 24th, 2009

“Cop makes arrest in bathroom after smelling crack”

Actually, it’s not what you think.

faith healing

Wednesday, February 18th, 2009

I saw a link today to a rather insane plan in the UK to “overcome whatever obstacles and difficulties we may face as a country, an economy and as individuals”:

For exactly two minutes on March 6th at 11.00am our consortium of psychics and healers will act as a channel for the positive thoughts of the entire country.

Um. A channel, to where? And what will that do? Also, how many actually positive thoughts are there in Britain? I remember an American comedian in the UK talking about why people say “Have a nice day” in America but not in Britain: because Americans might forget to have a nice day, but it’s not actually possible to have an entirely nice day in Britain.

Anyway back to this article, don’t worry, because:

It is a proven scientific fact that thinking about something often causes it to happen. Some call this quantum physics.

I’m not sure that this is a proven scientific fact, are you? And it only “often” causes it to happen? I wonder who the “some” are who call this quantum physics – I would guess that they are almost entirely not physicists.

welfare

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Walking home from work today I saw a big white shiny SUV with a bumper sticker which read “Work harder! Millions on welfare are depending on you!”

I immediately thought “I hope you lose your job and find out what it’s like, you evil bigot” I’m pretty sure that reflexive reaction means I’m a bad person, but even so it was also an offensive sticker. What do you think?

google suggest

Tuesday, February 10th, 2009

I’m assuming that you use the google to find things on the web – for most people it’s second nature. They recently started a neat new feature where the page will suggest search strings as you type – Amazon.com has the same kind of feature.

Today on Failblog I saw a kind of bizarre search suggestion and wasn’t sure if it was real, so I went to google.com and started to type in “I am extremely”. Sure enough – check out the last option (click on the image for it to be clearer):
googlesuggest

absurd bird

Thursday, February 5th, 2009

We had a bit of a surprise tonight when we got home from work: there was a small dead sparrow lying on the kitchen floor. Apart from the shock Emma got when we saw it, it was quite a strange thing to see. I assumed that the cats had done it in, but there was no sign of struggle – although I didn’t inspect it too closely as I was taking it outside, it seemed to be reasonably intact and there were no feathers lying around the kitchen. Plus the cats barely seemed to notice it.

The other puzzle was how it had gotten inside in the first place. Because of this never-ending winter the house is sealed tight as a duck’s arse, so it’s not like it could have come in through a window. However I was just down in the basement to do some laundry, and noticed that the cover of one of the old vents to the chimney seemed to be loose. I guess it’s possible that the bird could have fallen all the way down there, gotten through the vent and made its way to the kitchen (maybe the cats carried it there so that we would find it) but it’s still pretty strange.